Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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