Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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