You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
