Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
