Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i came on her dog
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
is it fun? or sober?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
