okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
