You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
