Operation Purity has been aborted
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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