i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
is this the sara with the beer cane?
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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