You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
