Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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