He asked to "fluff my boner.."
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
