flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
