used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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