wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I love having hate sex.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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