he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
