Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'm sobbing to NWA
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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