Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
