Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
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