it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
