I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Randomize