And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
