I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
