I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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