If i come over, it means nothing
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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