whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
