Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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