Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
