wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
grandma shit on top of the toilet
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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