He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
