Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
