You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
