i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Randomize