he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
North Korea, Best Korea!
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
