My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
