6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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