Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
