We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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