Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
