And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
