tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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