Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize