I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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