he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
