put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
