Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
time to smoke my breakfast
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Every concussion has its silver lining
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
