Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize