You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
