Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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