AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize