Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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