he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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